Armando recently published a story about a father who was not allowed to feed his son in the nursing room in a hospital. Apart from the circumstances of the particular case, truly unfortunate, there are certain facts that neither the family environment nor hospitals should ignore. One of the main ones is the need for intimacy of the woman who has just given birth.
The emotional needs of mothers and newborns are a fundamental part of their health care. Today it is also known that satisfaction and happiness They greatly influence physical fitness and the ability to overcome medical problems. All of that should, as I said, be taken into account by the family and the healthcare environment, considering that creating the right environment for emotional health is one of its fundamental obligations.
If we talk about newly born mothers The question is very important. The human female and her young are mammals. Instinctively they require a childbirth and a puerperium in privacy, without interruptions, without strangers, without unnecessary interference. The ideal birth would happen in the dim light and with the attention, when necessary, only of people of maximum confidence for the woman. The puerperium and the beginning of breastfeeding are no different. Mother and son, skin to skin, supported by the closest but in a bubble in which hormones flow and reinforce the bond created at the time of delivery in that first look. The right place would be the one that makes us feel in a den, a nest or a cave. Not a communal room full of unknown people.
Breastfeeding is a physical process, but it also has hormonal and emotional repercussions. Interruptions, tension, visits, appearance of strangers, all that negatively influences its correct implementation. And in addition all that supposes, often, unpleasant and inexplicable sensations for the mother.
AdvertisingThe woman who does not breastfeed or who is having difficulty breastfeeding needs the same attention and a placid and intimate environment, I would almost say that you have to pamper this even more, because the hormones that your body produces cause very intense feelings. The mother of the mother and her son are unique beings who need a safe nest where they feel protected.
When my son was born and was in the incubator they let me be with him every three hours. He barely suckled, opened his mouth and lethargy. I felt lost and absent. The day he was admitted before being given to me in the room, and that which would only be one day, he was breastfeeding in a room next to Neonatos with other women. Everyone bothered me. I felt that we needed a dark, silent place and that it was essential to be alone. My instinct was asking me. The room in the hospital became a distressing place because of the permanent and massive visits of my roommate and the lack of sensitivity of the healthcare staff.
Hospitals should serve to take care of the body but without neglecting psychophysical health. The emotional needs and the intimacy of a puerpera woman are very important for bonding, breastfeeding and the prevention of depression. We must ensure that you feel protected and happy.
Babies need permanent physical contact with their mothers as long as there are no real medical problems that prevent the kangaroo method. Parents should be able to be with mothers and babies all the time to support them. If hospitals do not comply with this important part of childbirth and postpartum care they are failing.
In this first stage it is often the case that women feel they have lost control over some of their emotions and are afraid of not understanding them. Whether a mother feels angry or scared if another person takes her child in her arms is normal, completely normal. That a mother feels like hiding from everyone's sight is normal too. There are even mothers who want to smell the baby's entire body and even lick it, and that, although it amazes us, is a normal instinct. Being mammals and animals is part of us. Accepting that part does not make us less civilized or human. It helps us integrate new sensations and be ourselves.
Let's imagine a lioness with her cubs, a wolf in her den, a hen who heats. The human woman has the right to feel like them. And those around them do disservice if we do not create an environment appropriate to their nature at this time. If the woman feels that way she is not crazy, she is not an exaggeration, she is not doing anything wrong. There is no way to question it or make it feel guilty. What he feels is what he feels. She is a female with her newborn baby.
There is nothing wrong with wanting our society to adapt to this facet of femininity. Being a woman is also being female. And when you are a recent mother, the female we carry inside comes out with all her might.
Many women suffer in the postpartum of mixed feelings of happiness and restlessness. Some fall into depressions even. In general we can find that many recent mothers cry, are afraid and feel intense rejections of intrusions. And, as I said, that is also normal. Not obligatory, but if it happens, it is convenient to know how to respect it.
Upon returning home The situation would not be different. Visits can wait. Those who come home should be people who do not produce emotional tension to the mother, who do not question her or take the baby if she does not want to. And it would not be bad if they are willing to carry the household chores that the puerpera is not in the moment to attend.
It was common in many ancestral cultures for the newly born mother to leave the community. This has an explanation. There are multiple variants but it is a cultural feature that is quite widespread. An example, generalizing, would be that of a mother who is staying in a shack somewhat removed from the village. Spend the "quarantine" with your baby, without taking care of anything other than the little one, taken care of and taken care of by other women in the family who have already been mothers until, little by little, returning to normal life.
If we made a transposition of that situation into our current life, a well-attended puerperium would be one in which the mother can dedicate herself exclusively to her baby, feeding her, skin to skin continuously, contained and sustained by her partner. And in privacy. Other people, the father or people of great confidence, would take care of the house, the other children and the food until mother and baby spent that first month exhausting, disconcerting and wonderful.
This ideal is not always possible. But trying to achieve it, to the extent possible of each family and medical center, would surely help mothers and their babies begin the path of life better. The need for privacy in the early days It is something that neither families nor medical centers should ignore.
